Approval and Acceptance in the Church

Acceptance\ n 1 : the act of accepting 2 : the state of being accepted or acceptable 3 : an accepted bill of exchange
(c) 1995 Zane Publishing, Inc. The Merriam-Webster Dictionary (c) 1994 by Merriam-Webster, Incorporated

Accept - verb
1 syn see APPROVE 1
rel fancy, like, relish; admire, esteem
con discountenance, disesteem, dislike, disrelish
ant reject
(c) 1996 Zane Publishing, Inc. and Merriam-Webster, Incorporated

Then the LORD said to Cain, "Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it." Gen 4:6,7

Then Peter began to speak: "I now realize how true it is that God does not show favoritism but accepts [people] from every nation who fear him and do what is right. Acts 10:34,35

I myself am convinced, my brothers, that you yourselves are full of goodness, complete in knowledge and competent to instruct one another. I have written you quite boldly on some points, as if to remind you of them again, because of the grace God gave me to be a minister of Christ Jesus to the Gentiles with the priestly duty of proclaiming the gospel of God, so that the Gentiles might become an offering acceptable to God, sanctified by the Holy Spirit. Rom 15:14-16

If we are Christians, we are accepted by God. God commands us to accept those whom He has accepted. We know that we are secure in God's acceptance of us, but it is equally important that we accept each other. We do not need to be approved or accepted by others in order to feel good about ourselves, but when we do not make others feel accepted we can cause them to stumble in the faith. When people admit to fighting sin, especially certain types of sin, we may become disgusted, "turned off," or even fearful. Then there are some who are non-conformists or of a different culture. They dress differently, speak differently, and perhaps have a different standard of living. Then there are the singles. We have more single women and men than ever in our churches today. Men and women alike are often treated as if there were a "scarlet letter" on their vest. This is a social stigma that has stuck with us since the days when divorce was less common. People have a bad habit of "turning their backs," even subconsciously. In the world, people that are different are often viewed as a threat. Christians are not immune to this and when it happens can cause a great deal of pain. But because we are no longer "of the world" we must be careful to guard against it. These people, that Satan would have us turn our backs on, are among the most desperate for companionship and acceptance. We know and believe that we and they are accepted by God unconditionally, but they may not. Since God accepts them unconditionally, we must accept them also.

Accept him whose faith is weak, without passing judgment on disputable matters. One man's faith allows him to eat everything, but another man, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables. The man who eats everything must not look down on him who does not, and the man who does not eat everything must not condemn the man who does, for God has accepted him. Who are you to judge someone else's servant? To his own master he stands or falls. And he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand. Rom 14:1- 4

As we read above in Webster's definition, giving acceptance is also to hold someone in esteem, to admire them. This gives a person a sense of worth. Withholding acceptance does the opposite and can cause a fear of rejection. Robert S. McGee in his book, The Search for Significance says:

Virtually all of us fear rejection. We can fall prey to it even when we’ve learned to harden our defenses in anticipation of someone's disapproval . . . Rejection is a type of communication. It conveys a message that someone else is unsatisfactory to us, that he or she doesn’t measure up to a standard we’ve created or adopted . . . Whatever the form of behavior, it communicates disrespect, low value, and lack of appreciation. Nothing hurts quite like the message of rejection . . . Thousands who have been broken by this rejection have left the church without understanding Christ's accepting, unconditional love, a love that never uses condemnation to correct behavior.

As Christians we must put a stop to this manipulative behavior. We must teach others that they have the unconditional acceptance and love of God. We are God's ambassadors on earth, ministers of reconciliation to God. If we reject others, and withhold the blessing they deserve, then we should be recalled for retraining! God can certainly do the work on His own, but He has chosen us to be His representatives. As a result, we must be aware and vigilant, as Satan would like nothing better than to divide the church along lines of "approval."

How? By giving each other not just friendship, but a relationship. First, show others that they are accepted by reaching out to them outside of the church. Call them when you notice them missing, invite them to your home or out to lunch after church. Show genuine interest in their everyday lives. Reach out, especially to those who “hit the altar” most frequently, or who show an abundance of sorrow or tears during a service. The Blessing by Gary Smalley and John Trent teaches that everyone needs The Blessing. In their book they teach:

The Basic Elements of The Blessing:

• Meaningful Touch

The act of touch is a key to communicating warmth, personal acceptance, and affirmation.

• A Spoken Message

Good intentions aside, good words are necessary to provide genuine acceptance.

• Attaching High Value

The words of blessing should carry with them the recognition that this person is valuable, not just pretty or talented. In scripture, recognition is based on who people are not their performance.

• Picturing a Special Future
  

We can convey to others the gifts and character traits that they have right now are attributes that God can and will use in the future.

• An Active Commitment

The blessing comes with a responsibility. The responsibility to believe in that individual and stick with them, even though they are not perfect.

Remember, people will always let you down. Jesus never will. We must do our best to let Jesus live through us and help us to fulfill our responsibility to others. Our responsibility to others doesn’t end when the worship service ends.

We read again in The Blessing:

A Churchwide guideline for loving others:

Imagine what would happen if an entire church decided to bless those in their fellowship and were trained how to do it! We would have a church where relationship needs were actively being met by a welcoming handshake or hug (meaningful touch); where appreciation for a fine sermon, working in the children's department, or simply listening to a hurting brother or sister was verbally acknowledged (spoken message). We would have groups of believers who acknowledged every members true worth (attaching high value) and who gave them words of hope and encouragement to reach their God given potential (a special future). All these elements would be wrapped in the willingness to let people fail and not let them walk away unnoticed, because a decision had already been made that they were valuable (an active commitment).

There are people in our church right now, who feel loved but not accepted, left out and ignored. It doesn’t have to be, indeed it should never be.

Test me, O LORD, and try me,
examine my heart and my mind;
for your love is ever before me,
and I walk continually in your truth. Ps 26:2,3

Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. 1Jn 4:7-12

Father, you are my sovereign Lord, who has accepted me fully despite my many faults. Lord, I ask you today to bless me, to point out where I have failed you, to forgive me, and that you be with me and keep me from sin, so that I may show your unconditional love and acceptance to others. I make my request in Jesus' name, Amen

Sermon, 7/19/09, Hero of the Faith

Here is my first sermon as Assistant Pastor at FaithBridge UMC!

Hero of the Faith

A Week in the Life

For those that are curious . . .

Upon arising in the morning, it's up, dressed, and out to feed Cowboy (the horse) and check on the chickens. After about 45 minutes I'm in the car, going . . . somewhere!

Monday I drove my car to the Second Harvest Food Bank of Northwest North Carolina in Winston-Salem and brought back about 500 lbs of food, mostly frozen meats but some "salvage" groceries too. That's a big chunk of the day, taking about 5 1/2 hours total to complete. I leave from my home about 9:30 am in Happy Valley of Caldwell County, take NC 268 to Wilkesboro and US-421 and I-40 the rest of the way arriving in W-S about 11 or so. Then back on US-421 to Boone, paid some bills and arrive back at the FaithBridge offices in Blowing Rock usually by 2 pm. Then unload, stock shelves, prepare for Food Pantry opening on Tuesday, and somewhere in there, grab a bite to eat. Then meet with Marianne (Senior Pastor) for a few minutes, and on this particular Monday the Casting Bread Board met and discussed, what else?, money! we also talked about fundraisers, the coming webpage and put a cargo van on the wish list. Headed down the mountain about 6:30 to a world class meal prepared by my favorite son, Robert! Then it's vege time (and phone time with Carol) in front of the TV until bed time!

Tuesday, it was up to Blowing Rock at 9:30 for Casting Bread (Tues/Wed 11 to 4). It was a BUSY day! We served 25 families and distributed about 1000 lbs of food! volunteer and church member Johnny came in at 1:30 so I could attend staff meeting. We stayed fairly busy all day with the last client coming in at 3:50. Then straightened up the shelves, restocked as well as I could with what we had, and spent some "Holy Time" with friend Linda. Headed home about 6 or so, went to the feed store and Wal-mart in Lenoir, and then collapsed in front of the TV with 1/2 a watermelon! After another excellent meal, fed Cowboy and collected eggs, and again enjoyed my tv time.

Wednesday was a little easier client wise, but I spent an intense day in front of the computer catching up on data entry from Tuesday, doing my month end report for Second Harvest, meeting with Pastor about the memorial service on Saturday, and a few other sundry tasks. I managed to get home fairly early for a change, about 6! I think . . . it's hard for me to remember that far back!

Thursday, another trip to Second Harvest, but this time in Terry's "ginormous" truck!! I LOVE that truck! It's a big 2500 cc Duramax Diesel 3/4 ton pick-up with a crew cab, AC, cruise control, and really comfortable seats! Makes the trip MUCH better! My car's ac is out :-( This trip too a little longer as I was able to bring back 1600 lbs of food. Yes, I pick it up and load it myself. SH staff is not allowed to help . . . liability. Back in Blowing Rock had the help of the wonderful Alyson E. and it was unloaded in no time! Then I had the help of 7 yr old grand-monster Allie putting it all away! Well, most of it anyway. She was a BIG help!! Exhausted, headed home about 6:30, again collapsing in front of the TV!

Friday is my "sabbath," my day of rest. Some Fridays are more spiritual than others . . . today I did N*O*T*H*I*N*G!!! Well, except computing, watching news at noon, and napping. I do feed my horse too! He would come in the back door if I didn't! When I get through with this, I'll be off to the store.

Tomorrow, will be laundry, study and prep for Sunday (Pastor's going to the beach!!), and assisting with the memorial service at 4:00. There's also the homemade Ice Cream Social that the church men's group is doing . . . I won't be missing that!

Then Sunday, is of course Church (The Blowing Rock School auditorium on Sunset Drive) and I will be teaching two classes afterward. (Next Sunday I get to preach!) Then home about 6:30. Monday morning, I get to start all over again! (You have a question? When do I clean my house? You're kidding, right? LOL)

So, that's it . . . A week in the life. In between all of this stuff, I talk to God and consult with Him on most everything. At night before I go to sleep, I read a bit of the current book (now Spiritual Traditions of the Contemporary Church) and I do find some time for scripture outside of my regular study time.

Until next time, may God bless you and keep you!

Pastor Tracey

My First Week

It was a busy week! Business as usual for most of it . . . Monday was a meeting of the Casting Bread Food Pantry board, working out lots of details. I also got my first "talking to" about money. Expected but still . . . I have to do better! Tuesday was a food pantry open day, with a church staff meeting, Wednesday was a food pantry day, Thursday an office work day, Friday morning had a Worship Design Team meeting and spent the rest of the day with my dear friend Carol. Saturday had a headache in the bed day. What did I get accomplished?

Not too much I'm afraid! Lots of small details attended to, but nothing major done.

Sunday is my dd's birthday, 27 years old! Hard to believe . . . that was a long day, 27 years ago. I am so very proud of what my daughter has become, and is becoming. I know that her Daddy would be proud, no IS proud of her too! You see, I believe that our loved ones who had passed on can see us, watch over us, and even pray for us. I base my belief on scripture but won't get into the theology right now. Every seven years, her birthday falls on Fathers Day, a bitter-sweet day for both of us. I hope that she has a great time at her party tonight, and that she gets home safely!

I also learned this evening of a death in the church family. Not a member, but a young daughter (15)is a member, and was severely traumatized by her mothers death. Mom died in her arms as she tried to assist her mother during the night. There is also a younger brother, who is also severely wounded. He lost his father less that a year ago. Pastor Marianne has asked me to assist with the funeral. *sigh* The negative aftermath of this death is going to be difficult. This was another MRSA death. She underwent surgery to make her life better, and ended up with an under-treated infection that too her life. I am SO angry! And helpless. I could go on and on . . . but I won't. I have personal experience with MRSA. MRSA took my husband's life fourteen years ago. Only 14 years? Seems like an eternity, a lifetime ago.

This coming week, I need to think about my sermon on July 19th, finish up my book-keeping, be available to Pastor (per the funeral), create a newsletter, distribute boxes for the food pantry, record a video clip for my sermon (on horseback no less!), follow-up on our website (Casting Bread), organize the altar Team for next Sunday, work on updating our online church directory, work in the food pantry every day, run to pick-up food at Second Harvest (a four hour commitment), and clean the church offices. And I have a date to the movies Sunday night! Oh boy. And I'm not even installed as Pastor until July 5th!

I'll keep you posted!

Blessings,
Tracey

Waiting No More

Here I am, at the beginning. The first day of my new life. I feel like Moses, coming off the mountain with the word of God in his arms. My face is bright, and I am excited. Too excited for words. What will I find when I come down. I don’t want to come down, not yet.

I left the highway at Black Mountain, and find myself at Montreat,the Presbyterian Assembly Grounds. My husband and I were here, a lifetime ago. I feel close to him, though he is waiting on the other side of the river for me. I was so proud of him, when he became an Elder. I know he is proud of me, a Pastor now.

I only have a minute, I’m on battery, up in the forest above Montreat, a holy place, even if it is Presbyterian!! We’ll forgive them for that, lol! I will continue my journey back to the camp, and continue to post my thoughts (soon as I find an AC outlet!)

I’m back, at home, trying to find the thoughts that I had on the road. Leaving Montreat, I called my dear friend Monty. He being a Presbyterian minister, I naturally thought of him and his dear wife Wendy. He offered me congratulations and praise for making it thus far. He also reminded me that when Moses came off the mountain his face was covered to protect the waiting people below! I wonder if we should lock me away until the glow dies down! I am pretty excited . . .

Hitting the road once again, I took US-70 to Ridgecrest, where I again sought an alternate route. Unbeknownst to most, is a road, a backdoor really, to Ridgecrest. It is Mills Creek Rd or Old US-&70. I followed this to Mill Creek Rd (dropped the “s”), a BEAUTIFUL road that follows the Norfolk-Southern railroad line. I actually intercepted a train, and drove beside it while I also went over AND under the tracks! It wasn’t long before the pavement ended and I wondered where the road would lead me.

Well, I came out at Old Fort. Very pretty, a quaint little town. Also near I-40. But I hadn’t had enough. I still wasn’t ready to “come off the mountain.” So, up on 70, I turned left(north)once again. This road stayed paved for about 5 miles, then went to gravel. I got a sense of history as I drove. It seemed as if the calendar was peeling off backwards! After another 5 miles or so, I saw the sign . . . “State Maintenance Ends.” Easy decision, go on, or go back. Onward . . . and UPward!

I passed Old Schoolhouse Rd, Newberry Creek Rd, and Slick Falls Branch. I was in deep forest, with a lot of other people! As it turned out, I was on a forest service road, in the Pisgah. I was climbing the knee of Mt. Mitchell. What a restful place to camp. I passed about 20 tents set up on the roadside sites, about 1/4 mile apart. If you like primitive camping, this looks like an ideal place. Just a little past the last tent, I found a small secluded campground for tents, trailers and maybe a small RV. No electricity, but they did have bathrooms (primitive) which I was glad to make use of.

My suspicions were confirmed when a VERY nice (and GOOD LOOKING!) Ranger let me know that I had about 6 miles to go to the Parkway. So I continued my 20 mph trek up the one lane gravel road, winding along Curtis Creek. I passed Big Camp Rock Branch, Licking Branch, Bear Drive Branch, climbing my way through 2800’. The bottom where I started was at 1400’! The air was cool and damp, and there was a brief shower. I felt very close to God.

The road changed character as I left National Forest road for National Park rd. I was in Laurel Gap. The view was awesome. I was now on Mackey Creek Rd, climbing Big Laurel Mountain. I came out just where I thought I would. To my left was Mt. Mitchell, to my right, Trail Horse Gap and the road home. I was at 4000’ elevation, and there was only one way to go. I turned right.

As I enjoyed God and the Parkway, my thoughts turned towards home. I was coming off a mountain top, entrusted with the word of God. What would I find when I reached the bottom? God said,

"They have lost hope. They will be worshiping idols, they will be
lonely, broken, and hurting."

I set my face towards home, and asked him,
"How do I do this? I feel so alone, I need help!"

I was actually thinking of my own single situation, selfless that I am . . . not! But he responded globally. He does after all see more of the picture than we do!

"What did my Bishop tell you? I stand at the Church door and knock. You will
invite them to come out to where I am, to work in the world, and obey me. You will encourage them to come out from their "safe" place of refuge, their "sanctuary" and take me out into the world with them, binding up the broken-hearted,healing the lame and sick, feeding the poor, giving hope to the hopeless and love to the unloveable."

Oh great! *rolling eyes at God* This reminded me of the children’s game, Who Stole the Cookie from the Cookie Jar? Change the words and you have "Who did God call to lead the flock? Who me? Yeah you! Couldn’t be!" Well I’m not passing the buck this time . . . Yeah, it was me. Somehow, God in His infinite wisdom, chose me to be your encourager, your cheerleader, your comforter, your teacher and your equipper. You are called to ministry, and I am to help you do it! We will work together to Follow Jesus, Make Disciples, and Transform the World!

I pulled off the Parkway in Blowing Rock, called son Robert to let him know that I was safely back and that I would be home shortly. I will be needing a whole lot of help. I know you’re there for me, as I am there for you. And He is there for us. He told me so!

I love all of you!
Your newest Pastor, Tracey